Insecurity
Emotional
security is the measure of the stability of an individual's emotional state.
Emotional insecurity is a feeling of general unease or nervousness that may be
triggered by perceiving of oneself to be vulnerable in some way, or a sense of
vulnerability or instability which threatens one's self-image or
ego.
The
concept is related to that of psychological resilience in as far as both concern
the effects which setbacks or difficult situations have on an individual.
However, resilience concerns over-all coping, also with reference to the
individual's socioeconomic situation, whereas the emotional security
specifically characterizes the emotional impact. In this sense, emotional
security can be understood as part of
resilience.
The
notion of emotional security of an individual is to be distinguished from that
of emotional safety or security provided by a non-threatening, supportive
environment. A person who is susceptible to bouts of depression being triggered
by minor setbacks is said to be less "emotionally secure". A person whose
general happiness is not very shaken even by major disturbances in the pattern
or fabric of their life might be said to be extremely emotionally
secure.
Emotional
insecurity
Abraham
Maslow describes an insecure person as a person who "perceives the world as a
threatening jungle and most human beings as dangerous and selfish; feels
rejected and isolated person, anxious and hostile; is generally pessimistic and
unhappy; shows signs of tension and conflict, tends to turn inward; is troubled
by guilt-feelings, has one on another disturbance of self-esteem; tends to be
neurotic; and is generally selfish and egocentric." (Maslow, 1942, pp 35). He
viewed in every insecure person a continual, never dying, longing for security.
Alegre (2008).
A person who
is insecure lacks confidence in their own value, and one or more of their
capabilities, lacks trust in themselves or others, or has fears that a present
positive state is temporary, and will let them down and cause them loss or
distress by "going wrong" in the future. This is a common trait, which only
differs in degree between people.
This is not
to be confused with humility, which involves recognizing one's shortcomings but
still maintaining a healthy dose of self-confidence. Insecurity is not an
objective evaluation of one's ability but an emotional interpretation, as two
people with the same capabilities may have entirely different levels of
insecurity.
Insecurity
may contribute to the development of shyness, paranoia and social withdrawal, or
alternatively it may encourage compensatory behaviors such as arrogance,
aggression, or bullying, in some cases.
The fact
that the majority of human beings are emotionally vulnerable, and have the
capacity to be hurt, implies that emotional insecurity could merely be a
difference in awareness.
Insecurity
has many effects in a person's life. There are several levels of it. It nearly
always causes some degree of isolation as a typically insecure person withdraws
from people to some extent. The greater the insecurity, the higher the degree of
isolation becomes. Insecurity is often rooted in a person's childhood years.
Like offense and bitterness, it grows in layered fashion, often becoming an
immobilizing force that sets a limiting factor in the person's life. Insecurity
robs by degrees; the degree to which it is entrenched equals the degree of power
it has in the person's life. As insecurity can be distressing and feel
threatening to the psyche, it can often be accompanied by a controlling
personality type or avoidance, as psychological defense
mechanisms.
Insecurity
can be overcome. It takes time, patience and a gradual realization that one's
own worth is purely a matter of perspective (or subjective opinion of oneself),
and so while it may be true that insecurity can follow from concerns relating to
objective reality, this is by no means a necessity, but more a tendency. The
first of Erikson's stages of psychosocial development details the challenge of
finding security and learning to trust oneself and one's
environment.
Mourning
behavior as indicator of emotional security
Someone who
might fit a common but by no means typical Western/Occidental notion of
emotional security is someone for whom the death of a relative or
friend:
initiates a healthy amount of sadness combined with
thankfulness
for the deceased's having been able to experience the joy of existence
(especially if he or she lived a long and/or fulfilling life),
hope that the
deceased person has gone to a 'better place' (if such hope would be religiously
appropriate - see afterlife), and
renewed dedication to make the most of
one's own remaining time and
take better care of one's
health.
On the other
hand, what defines a healthy amount of sadness is subjective by the very nature
of such potentially profound an experience as the death of a loved one, and
someone who might be said to display a degree of attachment to the deceased
person that does not coincide with common-sense notions of emotional security is
not necessarily reacting unhealthily by being:
Someone for whom such a death
initiated an unendurable amount of grief, leading him or her to
lose
commitment to his or her own projects, and
mourning-behavior extending well
beyond natural or culturally accepted mourning periods.
Something
like the death of a friend or a loved one can be a deeply spiritual experience,
and the wide variety of spiritual feeling in humanity may come into play in many
different and by no means not necessarily inappropriate ways, giving rise to the
conclusion that emotional insecurity is in part relative, so that emotional
insecurity can sometimes be seen as emotional turbulence even if it is
overwhelming for the person experiencing it.
Brain
chemistry
To a certain
extent, emotional security is a function of brain chemistry: some people are
naturally predisposed to feel less happy, and to be more adversely affected by
natural events, for example in the case of hypothyroidism. Certain medications,
such as SSRI's or even stimulants, are often prescribed to address such natural
deficiencies. The side-effects of these medications, however, in many cases can
negate their positive effects, for example when certain anti-depressants make it
difficult or impossible to experience orgasm by making the brain incapable of
cutting off the flow of certain hormones usually associated with positive
emotions but necessary to suddenly block for short periods of time in order for
orgasm to occur. It is also said that such medications blunt both 'the highs and
the lows,' sapping, for some people, a valuable, inspiring energy from life.
However, weighing the pros against the cons of such situations is something
different for each individual, and in many cases the dangers of naturally low
emotional security may be worse than the side-effects of the appropriate
medication, especially such as when a person is
suicidal.
Philosophies
There are
many philosophies which understand emotional security to be a product of
outlook. Such ideologies would advocate that there are safer steps than medicine
one can take in order to increase one's emotional security. These options may
range from self-help programs, substance abuse treatment programs, and
psychotherapy to physical exercise and spiritual or religious devotion. While
emotionally insecure people may feel lethargic, sometimes their best option is
to increase their endorphins through exercise; while they may be afraid of
rejection, this may lead to unhealthy loneliness, which the only way to overcome
is to risk rejection by trying to make acquaintances. Practices such as yoga and
Buddhism advocate abstinence from mind-altering substances; yoga is an extensive
science of achieving clarity of mind and security of attitude through training
and disciplining the body, while Buddhism is in essence a practice designed to
address suffering.
Philosophers
of existentialism deal with issues relating to emotional insecurity quite
frequently, focusing on the individual's spiritual condition in the world,
existentialism being a more emotionally and psychologically oriented philosophy
than other more rationalist schools. Soren Kierkegaard dealt with emotions such
as anxiety, dread, and despair, pointing to the role they can play in bringing
about life-changing transformation.
security is the measure of the stability of an individual's emotional state.
Emotional insecurity is a feeling of general unease or nervousness that may be
triggered by perceiving of oneself to be vulnerable in some way, or a sense of
vulnerability or instability which threatens one's self-image or
ego.
The
concept is related to that of psychological resilience in as far as both concern
the effects which setbacks or difficult situations have on an individual.
However, resilience concerns over-all coping, also with reference to the
individual's socioeconomic situation, whereas the emotional security
specifically characterizes the emotional impact. In this sense, emotional
security can be understood as part of
resilience.
The
notion of emotional security of an individual is to be distinguished from that
of emotional safety or security provided by a non-threatening, supportive
environment. A person who is susceptible to bouts of depression being triggered
by minor setbacks is said to be less "emotionally secure". A person whose
general happiness is not very shaken even by major disturbances in the pattern
or fabric of their life might be said to be extremely emotionally
secure.
Emotional
insecurity
Abraham
Maslow describes an insecure person as a person who "perceives the world as a
threatening jungle and most human beings as dangerous and selfish; feels
rejected and isolated person, anxious and hostile; is generally pessimistic and
unhappy; shows signs of tension and conflict, tends to turn inward; is troubled
by guilt-feelings, has one on another disturbance of self-esteem; tends to be
neurotic; and is generally selfish and egocentric." (Maslow, 1942, pp 35). He
viewed in every insecure person a continual, never dying, longing for security.
Alegre (2008).
A person who
is insecure lacks confidence in their own value, and one or more of their
capabilities, lacks trust in themselves or others, or has fears that a present
positive state is temporary, and will let them down and cause them loss or
distress by "going wrong" in the future. This is a common trait, which only
differs in degree between people.
This is not
to be confused with humility, which involves recognizing one's shortcomings but
still maintaining a healthy dose of self-confidence. Insecurity is not an
objective evaluation of one's ability but an emotional interpretation, as two
people with the same capabilities may have entirely different levels of
insecurity.
Insecurity
may contribute to the development of shyness, paranoia and social withdrawal, or
alternatively it may encourage compensatory behaviors such as arrogance,
aggression, or bullying, in some cases.
The fact
that the majority of human beings are emotionally vulnerable, and have the
capacity to be hurt, implies that emotional insecurity could merely be a
difference in awareness.
Insecurity
has many effects in a person's life. There are several levels of it. It nearly
always causes some degree of isolation as a typically insecure person withdraws
from people to some extent. The greater the insecurity, the higher the degree of
isolation becomes. Insecurity is often rooted in a person's childhood years.
Like offense and bitterness, it grows in layered fashion, often becoming an
immobilizing force that sets a limiting factor in the person's life. Insecurity
robs by degrees; the degree to which it is entrenched equals the degree of power
it has in the person's life. As insecurity can be distressing and feel
threatening to the psyche, it can often be accompanied by a controlling
personality type or avoidance, as psychological defense
mechanisms.
Insecurity
can be overcome. It takes time, patience and a gradual realization that one's
own worth is purely a matter of perspective (or subjective opinion of oneself),
and so while it may be true that insecurity can follow from concerns relating to
objective reality, this is by no means a necessity, but more a tendency. The
first of Erikson's stages of psychosocial development details the challenge of
finding security and learning to trust oneself and one's
environment.
Mourning
behavior as indicator of emotional security
Someone who
might fit a common but by no means typical Western/Occidental notion of
emotional security is someone for whom the death of a relative or
friend:
initiates a healthy amount of sadness combined with
thankfulness
for the deceased's having been able to experience the joy of existence
(especially if he or she lived a long and/or fulfilling life),
hope that the
deceased person has gone to a 'better place' (if such hope would be religiously
appropriate - see afterlife), and
renewed dedication to make the most of
one's own remaining time and
take better care of one's
health.
On the other
hand, what defines a healthy amount of sadness is subjective by the very nature
of such potentially profound an experience as the death of a loved one, and
someone who might be said to display a degree of attachment to the deceased
person that does not coincide with common-sense notions of emotional security is
not necessarily reacting unhealthily by being:
Someone for whom such a death
initiated an unendurable amount of grief, leading him or her to
lose
commitment to his or her own projects, and
mourning-behavior extending well
beyond natural or culturally accepted mourning periods.
Something
like the death of a friend or a loved one can be a deeply spiritual experience,
and the wide variety of spiritual feeling in humanity may come into play in many
different and by no means not necessarily inappropriate ways, giving rise to the
conclusion that emotional insecurity is in part relative, so that emotional
insecurity can sometimes be seen as emotional turbulence even if it is
overwhelming for the person experiencing it.
Brain
chemistry
To a certain
extent, emotional security is a function of brain chemistry: some people are
naturally predisposed to feel less happy, and to be more adversely affected by
natural events, for example in the case of hypothyroidism. Certain medications,
such as SSRI's or even stimulants, are often prescribed to address such natural
deficiencies. The side-effects of these medications, however, in many cases can
negate their positive effects, for example when certain anti-depressants make it
difficult or impossible to experience orgasm by making the brain incapable of
cutting off the flow of certain hormones usually associated with positive
emotions but necessary to suddenly block for short periods of time in order for
orgasm to occur. It is also said that such medications blunt both 'the highs and
the lows,' sapping, for some people, a valuable, inspiring energy from life.
However, weighing the pros against the cons of such situations is something
different for each individual, and in many cases the dangers of naturally low
emotional security may be worse than the side-effects of the appropriate
medication, especially such as when a person is
suicidal.
Philosophies
There are
many philosophies which understand emotional security to be a product of
outlook. Such ideologies would advocate that there are safer steps than medicine
one can take in order to increase one's emotional security. These options may
range from self-help programs, substance abuse treatment programs, and
psychotherapy to physical exercise and spiritual or religious devotion. While
emotionally insecure people may feel lethargic, sometimes their best option is
to increase their endorphins through exercise; while they may be afraid of
rejection, this may lead to unhealthy loneliness, which the only way to overcome
is to risk rejection by trying to make acquaintances. Practices such as yoga and
Buddhism advocate abstinence from mind-altering substances; yoga is an extensive
science of achieving clarity of mind and security of attitude through training
and disciplining the body, while Buddhism is in essence a practice designed to
address suffering.
Philosophers
of existentialism deal with issues relating to emotional insecurity quite
frequently, focusing on the individual's spiritual condition in the world,
existentialism being a more emotionally and psychologically oriented philosophy
than other more rationalist schools. Soren Kierkegaard dealt with emotions such
as anxiety, dread, and despair, pointing to the role they can play in bringing
about life-changing transformation.